July 23, 2011

Meow

Consulted a friend's boyfriend, and I was told the same thing, that I worry too much about myself. I worry too much about the unnecessary, that I'm too young, that I'm too immature, that I didnt experience too much in life, even though I really feel so. I was reminded again that age was and never will be a yardstick for maturity. Also, those that aren't wise are constantly thinking that age will determine the level of one's maturity.

It was struck on bull's eye, and I do have to admit that I seek a lot of attention, as much as I want to deny it. Even by posting this, I am already seeking a certain level of attention. I always try to think I'm not, but subconsciously, I really do seek attention because (as read by Terence) I feel insecure about myself and I have very low self-confidence, despite me being outspoken. Terence said that I'm unnaturally outspoken, because what I say are really random, not something that comes from my heart, and that plays a part in determining whether one is truly outspoken and confident or not.

I also learnt that in a way or another, love doesn't really transcend time. Even dust collects after time, and there is no doubt that one will stray away from their loved ones, but the most important thing is to relive the moments you've had when you fall in love. There is a huge different between friends and your lover, because after all you don't experience all the 酸甜苦辣 with your close friends. Maybe just 甜, but you dont experience 酸苦辣. And those usually happens between couples when they quarrel, when they get jealous or when they feel unappreciated.

And that true confidence is really important. It's not about putting up a brave front, but truly loving yourself and loving yourself even with your flaws. Don't worry too much because love is a learning journey for both sides, it need not necessary be the older one teaching the younger one, because both people have different takes in life.

Ah anyways, I felt happy that I've been there with baby Chan and Terence. I really appreciate that.

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