dead people are boring

There are many things I don't find a need to say, nor redundant to ask unless of course I am interest in the subject or the subject talking about the subject. Which probably makes me a boring person because contrary to beliefs, I don't think I am that vocal as far as my thoughts are concerned.

17 days left.

Funny how things doesn't go the way I want when I drink or smoke, but when I start going on an extreme and opposite lifestyle, things seem to run smoothly. Perhaps life is trying to show me the right way and path in life, no matter how small and insignificant things maybe.


I'm starting to feel better about the loss of my phone already. I could be better off without the little distractions like fiddling with my phone wherever I am. Reading a book is perhaps much better than reading senseless articles on the internet. Staying away from Facebook doesn't mean I'll be less connected to the world. I might even be more engaged to the real world in many other ways.

Lotsa random thoughts today. And also, planning a fixed schedule to stick to for this two weeks. Sweet.

You still haunt me

If only I was there for you then, you might not have jumped.

i would sigh a lot but that will just make me sound old and annoying

I think I screwed up. But I want to start doing things right now.

The past is a grotesque animal and you see in its eyes how completely wrong you can be.

I felt so disoriented today despite being out with a good friend. Just so many things running in my head and I couldn't snap out of it. I wonder if I could get my thoughts out of my head before dinner time.

Solitude is blessed.

I think it is about time I learn about the wisdom of silence and speak only when necessary.

괜찮아요

Perhaps one of the hardest thing is to let people go. You know that you maybe on the same bed with them but you aren't the one they're thinking about. And wedged in between your bodies is an empty space, as if your bodies are making it clear that they don't want to have anything to do with each other. But the line was drawn clearly from the start, and there are no gray areas. How could I have missed that?

The worst thing is, you can't even do anything about it. You could cry about it, you could rave about it, you could get angry over it but nothing can change the fact that this person you're lying on the very bed with, isn't in love with you. They are in love with someone else, who share a very different bed, a very different room, a very different house. But they might very well be sharing the same feelings for each other.

And in their mind, you will always be this "very good friend" to them. This "friend" whom you would like to keep by your side. This "friend" whom you think "can find and deserves someone better". This "friend" who will be just a friend and nothing more.

I never feel good reading through messages without permission and now I feel really bad for doing so. Nonetheless, I am relieved that I know what was going. I mean, come on, his eyes lit up and his lips broke into a smile upon receiving that message. Who else could it be other than the one you really love?

As you walk on by, will you call my name?

Won't you come see about me?
I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby
Tell me your troubles and doubts
Giving me everything inside and out and
Love's strange so real in the dark
Think of the tender things that we were working on