"There is no rule that you can't show feelings just because it's a game."

I loved him, but I couldn't share my feelings. I have to bury them deep in my heart, so that i can forget them someday.


We were talking about it and I realised how I've tried to constantly suppress myself from reacting with emotions, and to forcefully act with logical judgements instead. It scares me how "emotionless" I am with regards to dealing with problems I meet, and perhaps in relationships, and I wonder if that was because of my past relationships. I had 2 men that I loved deeply, but nothing turns out right, perhaps because I was just too emotionally unstable that I couldn't accept the fact that I wasn't good enough. Or maybe I just wasn't good enough because I just wasn't good at dealing with my emotions pragmatically.And perhaps that changed me to this emotionless, un-passionate void I've never wanted to become.

Trippy Tremors Following behind you

Everything seemed so surreal suddenly. I felt like there was a force pulling back my cheeks, and I just felt light and fluffy. But I tried to contain it anyway, so it was whatever.

I've been sick for the past few days and I think I lost some mass along the way too. I think I should be sick more often to shed off a few more pounds. Anyway, I came across cupla videos about the culture shock in Korea where lotsa expats were at South Korea and realised that many female colleagues will be blunt about each other's body mass. Even during greetings, they will tell you right in the face whether you seem to gained weight or lost weight. I wonder why they were brought up this way to be this obsessed with body mass. If I go there, I'll probably be called fat.