When we scream and shout

I wanna live in Cheydinhal

Cheydinhal river from The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

I love the graphics of The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. The art is so much more detailed as compared to The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind. It might be affected by the storyline because after all, the locations of the storyline in TES3 and TES4 are in different provinces of the TES world. The architecture in TES3 are somewhat similar in each and every town (again that might be because in the Morrowind province, thus a certain culture in the architecture), but in TES4, the building design varies from different areas. It's due to it being in the central part of the entire continent, that cultures overlapped at the borders, thus the variation of buildings. Pretty amazing and sweet works of art (and concept of the TES universe).

Cheydinhal is the the most beautiful city (though it very much looks like a town) I've seen in TES4. I love the richness of the elements present in the city. Water that streamed through the middle of the city, untouched by constructions unlike the city of Balmora in TES3 in which the river pretty much looks like Singapore river in a more ancient manner. You can see alot of flora around the city of Cheydinhal, and willow trees swaying in the breeze. And the lack of the fire element makes the city looks more peaceful and grounded.

'nuff said, I wanna live there.

Ticks buncha grapes.

You know that kinda feeling when there's someone you feel like having, but then your friend also likes him, and you just feel like giving it up for your friend because you don't wanna spoil a friendship because of a guy? I wonder if anyone felt like this before.

School fees unpaid D: Ohmaigad, and there's not enough money for the next semester. Meh, iz okay, I'm not doing anything for my birthday this year anyway, save money big time.

Tied to cinder blocks, shot in the chest, pushed in the river.

Memories of your ex are kinda like double-edged swords. Reminds you of happy times, but also how the past blasted a crater in your memories so deep that you find it uneasy to deal with anything related to feelings and relationships.

Oh neaat.

I'm sketching a comic strip now. Do you think anybody will buy it as a poster/t-shirt when it comes out full coloured? :O

"Britney! Britney! Why is my wife cheating on me?"

Yea screw the paparazzi, baby. And the hot, yummy, delicious policeman too.

So many things on my mind, I should probably channel them into illustrations.

*insert corny-title*

PinkDot Singapore this year was pretty breath-taking, and I didn't know the size of the dot was almost covering the entire grounds of Speaker's Corner. I thought it was great because I happen to see a lot of female friends from my secondary schools (they probably knew I was gay anyway), and we nodded in acknowledgement.





It's not possible to make everyone "accept" the LGBT community, because after all, it's instinctive for most people to reject what they cannot understand, what they fear, what they are not or cannot be, or what they cannot explain. But I always believe that acceptance is a choice. It is a choice to choose to truly put yourself in other's shoes and see from a different perspective, or to understand things superficially but rejecting ideas in the end and try to be the judge. It is a choice to control yourself and stop verbal abuse on others just because of their sexuality, or to lash it all out. It is a choice to accept; whether it's accepting how it comes about, or just accepting that it is not "abnormal" or "wrong".


Acceptance is a choice, but your sexual preference is not.

You can choose to see that gay men are sexual predators and are dangerous to children, base on one or two instances of media portraying them in this way, or you could choose to see that media is dangerous to children because it portrays gay men as sexual predators.

You, however, cannot choose if you want to fall in love with a man or a woman, or choosing which gender you would actually prefer to shag. If you're a straight man, why will you even consider a man unless you have that inkling feeling that men are what you're actually looking for? (that means you're gay by the way) The same thing goes for both genders.

Some might argue that bisexual have a choice, but no they don't. Sexually, perhaps they can choose a dick over a pussy, or a pussy over a dick but it doesn't mean they can choose to fall in love with a man or a woman. You cannot control who you fall in love with, because when it happens, it happens.

PinkDot to me is so much more than supporting the freedom to love, it is a movement that's telling people to love and accept people as they are, regardless of language, race, religion, body weight, looks, etc. We are but animals after all, and love is one of which that makes us so. Without love, we're just savage beasts that knows no warmth in the heart.

Been spending my time on a visual piece. And games :P The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion is damn fun. I wanna do a digital painting on the towns and cities.

It's the term break (finally). I have so many illustrations I wanna do, and thank god i finally have time to do it.

"But baby... You too fat to fly~"

I feel really tired from school. School feels like a chore and I dread going to school. (OMG JODY DE BROEDER FEEDBACK IS PLAYING NOW!! LOOOOL) Am at may wong cafe, and really need someone to talk to now, but i guess everyone's just indulged in their own happiness or satisfaction to listen to me anyway.

Im considering if I should drop out of my course cause Im losing motivation. I feel tired from school, and I cant focus. Dont know if this is a medical thing but I just feel like Im going to lose it any moment.

Anyway, I was talking to one of the two girls I met last night about my insights about greater powers in the heavens above. I really need one to help me through now. I should probably worship Sophia now for her writing and artscraft.

Words We Literally Use.

"What it means when you say 'Literally' " from theoatmeal.com

The words we use to describe homosexuality reflects on the way we think about things. When we talk about heterosexuality, we talk about wide range of activities. But when it comes to homosexuality, people tend to use more negative connotations and usually focus on the sex part of it. When we talk about heterosexuals, we talk about "relationships", but for the homosexual people, we talk about "sex". We say, "Heterosexual people have a life, homosexual people have a 'lifestyle' ". We say, "Heterosexual people have a moral vision, homosexual people have an 'agenda' ".

Probably someday, I'd get to say "Heterosexuals are caught up in the rapture, homosexuals... everywhere".

"What it means when you say 'Literally' " from theoatmeal.com

Amen.

I rendered my failed Cube Transformer thinggum because there was just no time to do more things. Humph. And I can't seem to make a .gif file out of mpeg4 files on Mac :s Wanted to upload onto the post but... whatever.

OH MY GOD I'M ALMOST DONE WITH PROJECTS. Almost. Just 2 more to go and I'll be an almost-free man. Fufufu.

Family

"We just need this someone we can trust and rely on when we're really fucked, even though we'll do the best we can to not end up being fucked up"

Every puff of smoke is like a problem wafting out from your heart. It was definitely enjoyable, because we had so much to talk about, so many heart-to-heart talks and I felt that we could've been much closer like a family if only we knew each other for a longer period of time. I'm glad that I actually talked about it, because I'll probably feel fucked up if I didn't have the chance to when I was already thinking about it and setting into the mood of emo-ness. Definitely great night, and fuck yea, cheap thrill (not really) baby.

We were talking about how much certain people meant to us, and only a few exceptions whom we trust them that they'll be there when we need them, and we also would be there for them if they ever need us. Then again, we'll be tired out by people who're constantly self-abosrbed into their own problems and issues that they become overly reliant on others and they can't seem to stand on their own anymore. It is heart-breaking to see people fall, yet as much as we want to help them, we're too tired to help them deal with their own problems because we know there's absolutely nothing we can do to help but only listen and give them comfort, which is what they basically need. It's just like how when we get really fucked up in the clubs and we don't really need anything else but the comfort of our friends, and to be held in their arms, and to tell us that everything's going to be fine even if we don't believe in it.

I guess the way we can connect with each other is usually through similar experiences rather than interests. We connect in a way that people can see from your eyes, not the bimbotic way of "oh-mai-gad-i-know-right-like-tolly-man" thing. I love this gay thing.

And yes, Truth or Truth is fucking fun.

好快好快哦

It's really hard finding extra time for myself these days; probably because I'm a loser at time management and a winner at procrastination. Nonetheless, I'm pretty glad that I managed to get sometime away amidst the rapidity of school life this evening. I'm pretty much over with my assignments, just 3 more to finish up where I've left off. The workload left me hectic flurry as I try to manage the ginormous pile of shit which has to be done in 2weeks and I just never know where to begin. Much like a mad man catching butterflies with his bare hands, things didn't get a start until about the mid of last week. I still can't believe the 1st semester of my sophomore year is coming to an end, and I'm mid-way to graduation (if things run smoothly).


I think I'm probably ready and in the right mind for a date now (yes after so long), though that's not my main priority at this point in life. It's not like I'm actively on a pursuit to find the love of my life, but that doesn't mean that I'm just laying back and dismissing people I have interest in (and reciprocating).

"Love sought is good, but given unsought is better."

And actually, I've come to terms of "casual dating" or "mass dating" in a subtle way, like you're just hanging out with different people (no sex involved, duh), and just understanding them better. I guess over the years, I grew more accepting of this ideology. Of course, you gotta get a good grip of the someone you come across whom you have the strongest attraction towards (and also make it clear to the "other dates" you had along the way...), and, yes, I still stand rooted to the primal (yes, double entendre) belief of faithfulness.

"He bought me a GLASS not a JUG!"

Just testing out the layout overall, not the actual design.


It was pretty boring last night, if not for Audrey I think I'd die of boredom. Also, I notice that many straight kiddos can't drink well. Before 12am, there were already drunkards going home, puking, fainting, sleeping, crazy, shouting, screaming... and alot more to go. I think we feel pretty old there, considering how long we've been partying. At least there were a cupla decent looking people there for me to ogle at.

I still have work to do, and I'm sneezing the shit out of myself.

I'm straight again tonight.

You know you hate Steve Jobs when your iPhone when it does that "IM-DEAD-I-CANT-TURN-ON-HAHA-LOSER" thing. It happened for the 2nd time to my phone, though the duration was shorter. But it's working fine now so hee, happy man :D

Then again, it seemed like this incidences are somewhat calculated, or probably had a important-event-sensor thinggum installed. It does this thing TWICE when I had important events. Can't remember the previous time, but tonight it's Zouk Mayhem.

*insert cheeky smile*

Maya = End of the my world

My feelings towards modeling is a love-hate kinda situation. Probably because of my interest, and how a bitch the software can be or how sudden an unexpected distortion of the primitives can ruin my work.

I wish I could project my own reality :/

The Law of Attraction

Step 1 - Ask yourself what you truely want. Cause bitch, you know you aint gonna get it.

Step 2 - Believe that it is already yours, and never doubt it. It's good to be delusional and fucking annoying sometimes. It's just stress, baby ;)

Step 3 - Receive all good feelings and dismiss negative ones. Always let people know that you're just another stuck-up bitch and everything revolves around you.

No skittles for breakfast.

3 June 2011 is a bitch.

I was asked if I want to defer the school for 1 semester to which I politely declined. I know health reasons should be taken note of but I know what I'm doing. Plus, I don't want another year wasted, since I'm already half-way through the course. Lotsa work in progress, probably post it up soon and yes, please, I want some comments (whether or not you expertise in the area of Digital Media Design for Films/Games).


Still designing the layout of this blog to complement Pink Dot SG season, probably will be roughly up soon by... tonight? Anyway, lotsa work to do.

p/s: This is not a very personal blog, so expect minimum emotional posts heh ;)

Pink Dot 2011

Since PinkDot SG is around the corner, I've been thinking of changing my blog layout / design to complement it.

Anyway, for those of you still ignorant of what's going on, check out PinkDot SG.

What is Pink Dot?

Pink Dot is the name of the organising group. It references the term, Red Dot, which is often used to describe Singapore. Pink, instead of red, because it is the colour often associated with LGBT (think: pink dollar and pink feather boas) but more importantly, it is the colour of our national identity cards and it is what you get when you mix the colours of our national flag.

Mark your calendars!

WHAT: PINK DOT 2011
WHERE: Hong Lim Park
WHEN: Saturday, June 18, 2011
WHAT TO WEAR: Of course, PINK!
TIMINGS: Activities commence 4.30pm

Also, check out on their limited orders for their Pink tee gear!

Pew pew beams.

I'm back to blogger (after about 3 years using LJ), I pretty much love LJ but you can't edit the html unless you're using a private domain, meh.

I'm just really tired, prolly do gonna catch a nap soon (after I'm done with work).